how do flat chested girls get laid?
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize