her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
