he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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