i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize