And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
