If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
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we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
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Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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