would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This beer is not sobering me up at all
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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