Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize