Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.

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(248): And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills. http://tfl.nu/4uyj

Replies (10) Good night (3315) Bad night (1147)
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(980): View more from North Carolina

after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape

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(980): after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape http://tfl.nu/d3c4

Replies (8) Good night (3759) Bad night (935)
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(360): View more from Washington

kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.

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(360): kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight. http://tfl.nu/tvlr

Replies (5) Good night (3730) Bad night (673)
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(410): View more from Maryland

She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.

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(410): She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY. http://tfl.nu/v8u7

Replies (85) Good night (1340) Bad night (12790)
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(949): View more from California

Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way

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(949): Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way http://tfl.nu/t96w

Replies (31) Good night (1914) Bad night (4972)
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(715): View more from Wisconsin

and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing

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(715): and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing http://tfl.nu/e1xa

Replies (11) Good night (3825) Bad night (1415)
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(314): View more from Missouri

Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.

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(314): Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late. http://tfl.nu/bosu

Replies (17) Good night (5059) Bad night (1298)
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(770): View more from Georgia

The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions

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(770): The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions http://tfl.nu/csf1

Replies (11) Good night (5916) Bad night (1046)
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(413): View more from Massachusetts

well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good

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(413): well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good http://tfl.nu/4dfc

Replies (17) Good night (3732) Bad night (1964)
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(585): View more from New York

you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it

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(585): you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it http://tfl.nu/37fg

Replies (17) Good night (4684) Bad night (1377)
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(612): View more from Minnesota

I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.

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(612): I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed. http://tfl.nu/r67y

Replies (17) Good night (675) Bad night (1468)
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(682): View more from Texas

Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"

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(682): Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this" http://tfl.nu/tpaw

Replies (1) Good night (1495) Bad night (593)
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(681): View more from West Virginia

I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion

(743): View more from

It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you

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(681): I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion (743): It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you http://tfl.nu/rspk

Replies (3) Good night (1205) Bad night (457)
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(858): View more from California

Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.

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(858): Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself. http://tfl.nu/wluz

Replies (1) Good night (850) Bad night (296)
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(913): View more from Kansas

You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink

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(913): You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink http://tfl.nu/tlvs

Replies (1) Good night (304) Bad night (206)

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