real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize