Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
