Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
