Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
He passed out mid-signature
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
