I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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