im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
