Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
