I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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