I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
