I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Randomize
