I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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