Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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