The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
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