Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
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