"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
