What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
