At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
