look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
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Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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