Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
babies were throwing up all over the place
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize
