so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
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