Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize