I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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