garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
