You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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