I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Randomize
