Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize