C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Randomize
