I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
