So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize