I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
