is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Randomize
