Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
Randomize
