I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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