What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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