It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
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