Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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