Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
