is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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