dude i'm inner monologue high
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
