he puts the penis in happiness.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize