I hope mine doesn't look like that
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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