he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
